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JerseySmarts.com

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog Takes on Occupy Wall Street

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Normally, I don’t share clips from television shows on this blog. It’s not because I don’t watch much television, but rather because I just don’t have a lot of time to watch the clips to see if they are funny or not. However, I saw this clip from Conan posted on the internet the other day and I had to share it. This video is of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog taking on the entire Occupy Wall Street situation from the bankers to the protestors to the media. Absolutely hilarious – enjoy!

Ha ha ha! I hope you enjoyed that clip!

Book Review: I Had the Right to Remain Silent… But I Didn’t Have the Ability

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As an avid reader, I always like picking up full autobiographies or books where interesting people write about themselves and their experiences. A while ago I was at the Barnes & Noble and I picked up “blue collar” comedian Ron White’s mini-autobiography/comedy book I Had the Right to Remain Silent… But I Didn’t Have the Ability. I gotta tell you, this is a pretty funny book.

A large portion of the book is Ron White’s stand-up act transcribed into the written word. You have to watch his act once or twice to understand his pacing, but if you understand his pacing then you’ll be able to read through the comedy bits relatively quickly. And even though I’ve heard White perform most of this material before, I did find myself laughing out loud two or three times at some of his jokes. Fans of White’s comedy will surely enjoy reading his jokes almost as much as they enjoy listening to him deliver them.

The book intersperses pieces of White’s comedy routine between pieces of his life story. And it’s an interesting story to say the least. I don’t want to give away any of the more entertaining parts, but I think the story of White going to Mexico to work on some sitcom was pretty entertaining (in a sick sort of a way). Also, the stories also show how White has depended on his friendship with Jeff Foxworthy to help him break through some of the stigmas that were attached to him due to his drug use. White heaps a ton of praise and thanks on Foxworthy and it comes across very clear to the reader that White attributes a great deal of his success to his friendship with Jeff.

Overall, I think that this is a good book for the price. You can probably find it in the bargain bin at your local Barnes & Noble for a few bucks. So if you’re looking for a very quick, very cost effective read that will also give you some laughs while telling a great human interest story, then you’ll want to pick up a copy of Ron White’s I Had the Right to Remain Silent… But I Didn’t Have the Ability. Enjoy!

FOX News Channel’s “Half Hour News Hour”

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FOX News debuted a show a few weeks (months, really) ago called the Half Hour News Hour. It’s a right-wing take on the Daily Show, Saturday Night Live’s Weekend Update, and the Colbert Report. The show has absolutely dominated its competition in its time slot on cable news. Yet it gets universally panned by critics.

Seems about right!

Listen folks, the hard truth of our world is that television programming is DOMINATED by programming from the far left and the liberal point of view. It just is. Anyone who watches Jon Stewart on the Daily Show and doesn’t think that the show has a huge liberal bend is just batty. And quite frankly, the humor that Jon Stewart spews is no more “factual” than the humor that the hosts on the Half Hour News Hour spew. Both shows tell fake news as real news, but only Stewart’s news is actually taken as fact by the brainwashed young masses…

And this is a fair blog – the AM dial is completely controlled by the right wing pundits, as is most talk radio. Do those hosts tell the complete truth? Well, sometimes, but they certainly have an agenda that they are pushing – that’s clear.

What I find really saddening about the media universally bashing this FOX News comedy show is that it proves things that the brainwashed masses just don’t want to admit. For example, this show is, in fact, a success and by NOT admitting that in their reporting, the major media sources show their anti-FOX bias. Remember, we’re not talking about the USA Network or network television channels like NBC or CBS where getting 1.4 million viewers is a miserable failure. This is a cable news channel. CABLE NEWS!

Make no mistake about it – to draw in numbers like that for a half hour comedy show is impressive and a huge success. But don’t expect to see that fact put out there in the mainstream media…that would ruin their obvious falsehood that the show is a failure for the right-wing and the FOX News Channel! If you want to watch a funny half hour of television, then check out the Half Hour News Hour. Is it the funniest 30 minutes on television? Absolutely not – check out Scrubs or the Office for that! But is it better than the 50+ “Bush is an idiot” jokes that you’ll get on the Daily Show and the “President Bush is Stupid” jokes you’ll get on Weekend Update?

Absolutely. And don’t believe just me – the numbers speak for themselves!

Movie Review: Nacho Libre

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Nacho Libre absolutely sucked! That might have been the worst “movie” that I’ve ever seen. There was no story, there was no point to making the movie. And it was short. WAY too short to spend $9 on going to see.

Those assholes claim that the thing is an hour and forty minutes long. Bullshit. We entered the theater to buy our tickets at 5:40, I went to the bathroom, my friend went and got some snacks, and then we entered the theater. Of course there were at least 7 minutes of commercials and another ten minutes of previews and then BAM! the movie starts. So it’s easily 6:00pm by the time the movie started… and when the closing credits were already rolling I asked my roommate what time it was and I saw his cell phone – 7:20pm. Maybe the “Super Duper” DVD release will have the missing twenty minutes, but that’s another story.

As a side note – this is happening more and more. When we went to go see the David Spade movie with Napoleon Dynamite in it a few months ago, the same thing happened – at least a half an hour was shaved off the movie.

Now for the movie itself, it was just terrible. The standard necessities such as character development and, you know, a plot were no where to be found. Here’s the movie in a nutshell… Jack Black loves wrestling, he’s a friar, he becomes a wrestler.

That’s it.

It’s not that funny, either. The only genuinely funny part comes at the end of the movie in the big match where Jack Black flies like a bird to trounce on top of his opponent. There is no backstory, there is no attempt to build to a climatic conclusion, there is nothing at all worth going to see.

Quite frankly, I want my money back. I said to my roommate before, the entire movie plays like one inside joke where only the writers know what the joke is…though I think I have it figured out. The inside joke has got to be that they could write a movie about absolutely nothing and because Jack Black is in it (who isn’t even really that funny anyway) – people will come see it and they’ll make millions.

Funny joke, huh?

On a scale of 1 to 10, I give this movie a 0. There were no redeeming qualities at all – and the asshole, hillbilly, white trash hick sitting two rows in front of us didn’t help by clapping REALLY loud for a LONG period of time during the most unfunny parts of the movie. The theater had 15 people in it – and this fucking asshole had to be sitting there clapping himself stupid.

A complete waste of time and money.